Looking over my scrapbook

I’m very excited that I’ll be launching my new website very soon. This one’s been good for me; it’s just time for a little pre-Christmas tidy up, complete with new shoes and hair.

What’s been so fun is going back through all of my content over the last couple of years. I get to immediately associate where I was at that time and what was going on in my life, a bit like looking back through a scrapbook.

It’s true that when we’re on this journey that we often don’t take time to look back and admire the view. That’s because we’re always thinking that we have to move forward, to get further, higher, deeper, whatever. I am very guilty of this particular desire. It’s almost as if we have to “schedule in down time” as my friend likes to call it.

That in the end is a bit like skipping Savasana. It feels like it shouldn’t really matter, however, it’s the thing which matters most, the pose which is most challenging and most transformative. Plus, it is so honest to goodness de-lic-ious.

Celebrate good times!

It's been a brilliant couple of weeks, whole montage of human endeavour and emotion which the whole nation has got behind and supported. It's been an absolute pleasure.

Now we get to hit the pause button and just celebrate a little bit. It's so often that we don't allow ourself a moment to enjoy. Hands up who's skipped out of Savasana early? Yep, me too.

So I declare this week at week to simply bask, rest on your laurels and hang out in your favourite restorative pose for as long as you please! Enjoy, there's the rest of your life for working!

How Yoga Can Improve Your Sex Life

I'm delighted to introduce, Lisa Redding's guest blog on how yoga can improve your sex life...

There are many reasons to practise yoga, and many short and long-term benefits. They include better general fitness, improved mental focus, increased energy levels and decreased stress along with a myriad of other mental, physical and social benefits. Did you know that yoga can also improve your sex life?

It is not a common reason to begin practising yoga, but many people find it is a welcome, if surprising, extra benefit. Many people find that practising yoga leads to an increase in their sex drive and in better sex. People can find that they have better orgasms and more emotional closeness during sex. Couples who have been having problems with their sex life can find that yoga helps them rekindle their old desires. There is even evidence that yoga can help men who have been having problems with premature ejaculation.

Connections

There are some fairly obvious superficial parallels between yoga and sex. Both are activities that involve physical, mental and sometimes spiritual effort together. Yoga’s ability to help improve the mind and body in various ways should, by reason, also help improve someone’s sex life. There is, however, more to it than that. Studies have found some very specific connections between practising yoga and improving one’s sex life.

Physical Effects

Yoga improves general health, and so it is likely to improve general sexual function. Benefits of yoga can include improvements in the cardiovascular system and better muscle tone, which tend to just make our bodies work better in general. Better blood flow through the body can lead to more intense orgasms and can help men maintain better erections. Being more flexible can mean being able to try out more sexual positions. Being stronger can mean you can cope better with the physical demands of sex, and have sex for longer. Practising yoga regularly can often mean you have more energy in general, and of course, that can be useful during sex.

Certain yoga poses can have quite specific physical effects, especially the Mula Bandha, or root lock. This acts in a similar way to pelvic floor exercises to strengthen the muscles around the pelvis and genitals, making them stronger. In women in particular, that can help lead to explosive orgasms.

Mental and Emotional Effects

Yoga’s physical effects, such as having improved orgasms, are also linked to the mental and emotional effects – as you would expect, given that the connection between mind and body is so fundamental to yoga practice. On a quite basic level, yoga tends to led to increased body confidence, which can lead to increased sexual confidence. Practising yoga also helps people focus on intimacy when they are having sex. This is where yoga links to tantra, although that does not mean that practising yoga means you will have tantric sex (although it could be a good place to start). However, practising yoga means that you tend to be better able to clear the mind of chatter and negative thoughts, and focus better on the connection between you. When the mind and the body are fully relaxed, sex tends to be more intense and emotional.

Yoga has also been shown to help men with premature ejaculation. One study compared the effectiveness of yoga with the drug fluoxetine (Prozac - anti-depressants are often prescribed for premature ejaculation) on men who suffered from premature ejaculation, and found it to be more effective. The men in the study practised a number of yoga poses for three months, and were found to have general improvements in their sex lives as well as being able to delay orgasm. It seems that yoga can help people have a healthy sex life in both general, and quite specific, ways. Some people might find that their sex life improves as a side-effect of yoga, but yoga can sometimes be used as a treatment for sexual problems.

While you should see plenty of benefits to your sex life from practising yoga separately, practising yoga together could become, like sex, part of your life together as a couple. Some yoga poses need two people to work together to help each other, and doing that together can help build trust in each other. Yoga should not be seen just as a tool for having better sex, but as part of a holistic approach to improving your lives, both individually and together. Though naturally, better sex can be a very enjoyable part of that!

Today's post is brought to you by the number 7...

It’s 3:42am on 8th July 2012 and I’m called on to write, I will not be able to rest until I do. I have never wished to speak about my experience on 7th July 2005 while I was going to work except in the most private of situations and I don’t wish to express it now. We all have our stories that we all carry with us. Our experience, like tiny shards of coloured glass, make a stained glass window for light to stream through in the most unique way. It is who we are, this experience is part of who I am as much as everything else which has happened to me. It is me.

Seven appears to be symbolic. Seven anniversaries have passed since what happened that day. These seven years are bookended by my country winning the Olympic bid and now being ready to deliver The Games. Seven years and my body has completely renewed itself of all its tissues. I am literally a new person. Yet I still carry the experience in every fibre of my being. What I left behind on that train made space for me to carry what my friend and hero once described as my 52 silent friends.

Words never really seem enough and yet, words are sometimes all there are. Always when I have felt like I had nothing left to give, I reached out for help. When I thought there was no help, I reached out. When I didn’t know I needed help, it came. While I sit here now I realise I had the words, they already exist and have done for centuries, they dropped into my head this morning and have been repeating themselves in my mind all day.

 

लॉका समस्ता सुखिनो भवंतु

Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bavantu

"May all beings everywhere be happy and free, and my the thoughts words, and actions of my own life contribute in some way to that happiness and freedom for all"

May -  this is my intention. I may not get it every moment of every day. However, in the act forgetting is the act of remembering. I will ease up on myself when sometimes, oftentimes I miss the mark.

All beings everywhere - even just within myself this asks much, yet this is what I truly believe I am being asked to step up to do. Can I accept all parts of myself: the part which forgets, the parts which gets angry, the parts which I try and hide. All of me. And all beings, that’s harder still. Every single being is here because they are meant to be. When I don’t except parts of me, when I pretend some beings are separate from me I become disconnected. When this happens, the darkness has won. If I miss one of those shards of coloured glass, light cannot shine fully through me. Therefore, I welcome and acknowledge all parts of myself and all beings.

Be happy and free - It is our nature to be happy and free. Even on days when it feels inappropriate or our outward expression cannot be one which is joyful. We are in the uniquely privileged position of a human birth. Happy and free is what we are, this what we are meant to be. This is the light which shines through the window of my experience. Even when my window gets dirty and the light isn’t so bright, it is always there. I will shine my light.

And my the thoughts, words and actions of my own life contribute - thoughts, words and actions are powerful. Thoughts are unmanifested words, actions are words becoming reality. What I think, say and do is important. I choose to the best of my ability to choose my thoughts, words and actions carefully with the knowledge that I am happy and free, just like everyone else.

In some way - “No man is an island, entire of itself. Each man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main” - John Donne. My thoughts, words and actions make up part of the consciousness of humanity, a part of our collective stained glass window. We are many and we are one.

To that happiness and freedom for all - As much as my nature is to be happy and free, so is it every other being on the planet. Every single one. To ignore one is to diminish all.

To my 52 silent friends, I carry you with me always. And I set this intention for you.

Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bavantu

Play time!

This week it's mainly been about rocking out on my yoga mat and everyone I meet. At least to the best of my abilities!

The Sanskrit word for this is lila - play. That’s what I’ve been doing my best to embody, why? Why not? Who doesn’t want to have more fun in their lives. The other day I was visiting my three year old nephew and his mum called him in to brush his teeth. His response - “I’m too busy mummy”. He was too busy lining up cars. I had to leave the room and take a little walk I was shaking so much trying not to laugh.

Man, I want that feeling! When nothing else matters except what you’re doing right now. Not who you were yesterday or what happens if you don’t do whatever it is perfectly. Because really none of that stuff matters, because there’s nothing you can do about it anyway. All you can do is do whatever you’re doing completely, presently and with a full heart.

Be the butterfly

It has been a week of watershed. Slightly ironic since there’s been a lot of water around for a June. There are some times in life when you have to let go of stuff. I think it’s the yoga that’s made this a lot easier than it used to be. We like, as humans to hang on to things, things which seem to define us and make us unique. What we forget is that we already are unique, every inch of amazing us.

What’s brilliant about yoga is that it gives us permission to redefine ourselves, from breath to breath and remember how special we are. It is said that the yogi is twice born, like the butterfly. The caterpillar creates itself a chrysalis and completely dissolves its form to arise as a butterfly. Human cells also replace themselves at varying speeds and are completely replaced every seven years. It’s pretty cool to think that we get a completely new body every seven years and even cooler to think parts of our physical bodies change much more frequently than that. Our blood cells are continuously being replaced. When we practice yoga each breath, each pose, each practice is like a shedding of past habits and fears to awaken to a new dawn a new part of ourselves are revealed and once it’s started to be revealed it just keeps on coming.

The butterfly never returns to being a caterpillar.

We could be heroes, just for one day

Some days it’s hard to muster up the courage to do what we know we ought. I for one am an absolute expert at finding myself things to be busy about, especially when I know there’s an elephant in the room or within my heart which I really need to have a conversation with.

This is the challenge of the yogi. Because sometimes knowing the right thing to do isn’t enough. Sometimes we need to take action. We need to stand tall in our own power and own it. Whatever it is. When we take the seat of the yogi we’re asked questions of ourselves and we get to choose how to respond. Sometimes that response isn’t easy, sometimes it means going against the status quo.

I love that the word courage comes from the French word for heart, coeur. Because that’s what yoga gives us. The courage to stand in our own heart, in our own courage, in our own strength.

That’s why I get on my mat and practice. To know myself more, to know my heart’s longing, so that when I get asked to respond to challenge I have the power. Then I get to stand up as a yogic warrior and act.

Hidden gifts

Hanuman is one of my favourite deities. He’s the monkey god, the gods are reflections of ourselves so it’s not that surprising I’m drawn towards the monkey man.

All good things start, as my mum would tell me, with the mother. In Hanuman’s case this is Anjana. Anjana was a very devout woman who wanted nothing more than to be a mother. To this end she prayed and practiced daily. The wind god, Vayu, heard her prayers and resolved to help Anjana, to this end he sent some grains of rice with his bird friends to Anjana. As she reached into the air with her hands in Anjali Mudra the birds dropped the grains of rice into her hands. Knowing better than to question the gift she’d received, Anjana simply opened her mouth and tossed in the rice. As soon as they hit her stomach she became pregnant.

When we first start a yoga practice I would say it’s pretty normal to want everything straight away. To become a master or at least have a list of things we want to tick off, so we can say we’ve done it. Or at least that’s how I was and secretly still am. It took a long time for me to realise that this practice isn’t linear, sometimes it doesn’t make any sense and sometimes we feel confused and demotivated. The thing about yoga is that we get exactly what we need and we don’t get to decide what that is. We must, as Anjana did, show up, every day, clean the mirror of our deepest Self and accept whatever we are offered. In our society, that’s not so easy, staying in the moment with what is isn’t easy. However, when we do play in the present moment life gets a whole lot simpler and happier.

Hanumania!

My teaching has taken an interesting turn of late and moved into a rhythm of six weekly cycles. The cycle just gone has all been about the different elements in nature which we align with when we come to our practice. The next series is inspired by my great friend.

I’m going to be integrating the stories of Hanuman, my favourite deity, into my classes and seeing what we can learn from the great monkey god. It’s ok not to know much about Hanuman, that’s part of the fun. My teacher explains all of these things like they’re maps, they’re not there to tell us what to believe or think, they’re simply there to help us on this journey. It’s like when you visit a new city, it’s handy to have something to guide you, it’s not going to tell you which way to go.

I love the rich symbolism held within the stories of the deities. And Hanuman has lots: from the story of his birth right through to his stories of heroism. It is said that we are all of the characters in the story and although they have been told for generations we can know our own lives better by hearing and contemplating them from where we sit in the moment we hear them.

That’s why I never get tired of hearing the stories because each time they reveal something new. They are organic and ever changing. It’s Hanumania!

What's outside is inside, what's inside is outside

We've definitely witnessed the forces of nature over the last few weeks in the UK. Constant rain in the South East, much more like I remember in the South West where once I’m sure it rained from October to March without a break. It hasn't been glamorous, no flashfloods, thunderstorms or anything like that, just constant, damp and unrelenting, the weather the British climate does so well. It was greatly needed and greatly purifying. What I noticed most of all is the reflection in my own life. As things started to go somewhat awry for me personally, the rain came down and kept coming down. Even amidst the intensity I couldn’t help wondering if that rain was coming down to wash away old patterns, old ways of doing things, like a torrent, allowing for nothing but the new to arise.

What was remarkable was that once my personal intensity had past the sun started to poke out from behind the clouds. And now, as I sit with the sun blazing through the windows I’m grateful that not only is my situation resolving but I believe there’s been an opening for much deeper, more profound relationship to arise.

I’m not trying to say that the Universe brought the rain for me; even thinking that makes me smile a little. What I’m saying is that yoga is all about lining up with nature, lining up with those threads which join us all and seeing the shared human condition there. It’s about noticing that what is happening right now is not something which has been done to us, it’s simply the play of life and our role is to play our part and use our lessons wisely. Or not, there’s value in ignoring the rain sometimes too.

Give yourself some space

I’m approaching the end of my series on the five elements: space. The final frontier. Apologies, I couldn’t resist.

It’s a bit of a tricky concept because of the intangibility of space. Space is really the area that we occupy, however, the cool thing is that the world is mostly space... wah? My friend explains it this way: if Wembley Park were an atom the amount of actual matter would be the size of a pea. Yep, my eyes kinda dilated and my head expanded a little bit from that comment. Try this one: two objects can never actually touch, there’s always space inbetween. You think your hands are clapping together, the ball is bouncing on the floor, ‘fraid not, not quite!

Why does any of this matter except to bring about brain ache? It matters because when we have those moments, like every other second for me, that we’re not enough, we’re lacking, that the whole world is closing in on us and we just can’t break free we can remember how much space there is and carve a little extra out just for us.

Find a little more space this week by plonking down on a meditation cushion or other comfortable spot, setting a timer (or space creator you might call it) and taking a journey deep inside, to the final frontier.

Let go...

There are some times in life when it all becomes a little bit overwhelming. When the list of things to do or things to worry about becomes so much that there’s nothing for it but to throw everything into the air and pray that something comes in to help you out. The thing is, it does.

So this week I’ve been teaching that there is a beauty in just surrendering. I understand that surrender is a difficult word. It seems to makes us vulnerable and no longer in control. What I would say is that we’re not in control. No matter how much we think we are or how much human beings evolve to protect themselves. All it takes is a hurricane to dispel that myth.

What it doesn’t mean is that we give up responsibility, and therein lies the paradox. We can only take responsibility for our actions and let go of the outcome. How we are within and without ourselves does have an effect on the world, so what do you choose? I choose to charge myself with as much positive energy as I can muster so that I create that energy in my world. We can choose to do the opposite. It’s just that at some point we have to just leave for more space, more breath and more light to move into us. We can only do that if we’ve let go of the expectations we have for our life. That’s surrender.

So this week, let go by turning throwing it into the air and turning everything upside down. Literally. Do a handstand, a headstand, a shoulderstand or simply put your legs up the wall. Then let it go.

I'm on fire!

Moving through the elements we get to fire. I’m generally a pretty fiery person which is good most of the time. However, if I’m not careful I get burnt out. Quite literally. Fire does that, it can be destructive or it can be a way to bring about change. Nothing ever happened because we wished for it, at some point we also had to act.

So what does that mean when we come to our yoga mats? Because there always has something to be do with yoga, right?

From the first breath it’s the reason why we set an intention for the practice. Why we practice, why we continue to ask that question, like a match sparking. Then we really get fired up, we engage muscles so our bodies can carry that intention. After that we stoke the fire with more air by finding more space in the pelvis and shoulders. The fire really starts to roar when we scoop our sitting bones and draw the heads of the armbones back. Then the final expansion comes in as we spread our fiery bodies out from that super ignited core. No you’re on fire!

That’s in every pose, and that’s how dreams come true.

Dive in!

This week is all about the water element. It’s fun to think of our asana practice in terms of how we relate to each of the five elements, it gives us a totally different perspective on these poses we do all the time. The thing about water is that it appears to us in many different forms, from the deep ocean to the playful stream.

It holds great mystery and great danger. Energy flows through all of our body’s systems like a vast series of underground rivers, it gets stuck and stagnant so that sometimes we have to flush it out.

This week when you come to your mat I invite you to dive deep into the ocean of your own consciousness and explore the unknown within. Choose a pose, a backbend is good, that calls upon you to hold the stillness so that you can open up fully, crash like a wild wave and open your heart to this great universal flow.

Then allow everything to settle back into the river bed, the silt which you’ve shaken up to be refreshed by a new vibrancy and openness. Allow each part of yourself to be refreshed and revived. And you don’t even need to go anywhere near a beach, unless you want to.

Out of the bubble

I’ve just come back from teacher training, again. It was so much fun. No matter how much training I do there’s always something new to learn. What I learnt this time most of all is that this whole thing is a journey. We start off in the little protected bubble of the mat, being guided by our teachers and held by our friends. Then, and sometimes I’m not sure why, we step off the mat and walk to the front of the room. That’s when we get all these amazing maps and all of a sudden our mat becomes a flying carpet from which we view the world afresh.

Doing a training of any kind, by which I mean really any practice infact – from closing your eyes for a few moments, to a kickasana practice to a 108 hour TT – is much like stopping in at a rest stop. You get touch in with your journey. I’m not really concerned with where I’m going anymore, except Starbucks, that’s usually in the equation somewhere.

Sometimes we need to dust off our maps a bit or unfold that corner which got crumpled in your bag that time you forgot about it. Then to look up at the sky on a beautiful sunny day and feel so grateful you’re on this path and someone gave you some landmark and then you never want to stop seeking out new places to go.

Twisting the night away...

It’s around this time of year when go home and my mum has turned the house upside down. Dust, vacuum, stuff, everywhere. Oh yes, it’s spring cleaning time. I have to say, I’m not quite as diligent as my mum. However, I do find that I’m drawn into my kitchen and it does end up looking like a microcosm of my mum’s house. I love to cook so to create deliciousness in my home I first need to do a bit of organisation. That means everything comes out of the cupboards, shelves, fridge and freezer. Create a bit of space. Then everything gets clean and put back so I know exactly where it is. The rubbish gets junked, that spice I used in a curry a year ago, it’s outta here. Then I restock my kitchen with what I really want in there, so I can make magic.

So it’s a thing at spring time I know. And the yogis equivalent of spring cleaning is twists. This week I’ve been on my mat twisting away, rinsing and soaking, as we say, my internal organs. Doing twists is like cooking from a recipe, you need certain ingredients:

1. A strong foundation, whatever part of you is on the floor stays on the floor. That means the side you’re twisting away from doesn’t join the party. That, my friends, is what you call a turn, not a twist
2. A whole wad of a big breath, so you get super long in the torso
3. Hugging the midline so you’re super clear through the whole of your spine
4. Then you have everything you need twist the night away. Make sure you drink lots of water, sluice out the toxins.

Up above the streets and houses...

I had my haircut last weekend. That’s not a cue for lots of compliments about my hair, although; please feel free to compliment my hair. It was one of those days which doesn’t know whether to rain or be sunny or do both... at the same time.

So I had my hair washed and was being sat down to be made pretty and the lady washing my hair said “I wish it would stop raining”... I looked outside and said “wow, look at that rainbow”. Suddenly she got totally excited about the rainbow and even apologised for getting excited. I was like “dude, I know, I get excited by a cup of tea and a biscuit, it’s the small things that matter”.

Thing is, often we’re so busy with day to day stuff that we forget that there’s so much beauty around us, that moment in time where the conditions are perfect to create this amazing vision; a rainbow. It’s a miracle that light and water combine to split apart white light into a spectrum of colours. I wonder how many times I’ve missed one because I’ve been rushing away from the next downpour.

So this week is most definitely a backbend week. How many ways can I fully extend my spine into a perfect arch the most radiant way and create my very own rainbow. Who knows, I might find my very own pot of gold.

Wow!

I pretty much knew that yoga is amazing and healing for all kinds of people and for all kinds of reasons. What I hadn’t fully appreciated is how frickin’ fast that transformation can be. I guess that once you’ve been practicing a while you get used to being able to make a shift in a few poses. You get used to feeling good most of the time and when you don’t, how you get back to balance. Suddenly feeling good is the norm, feeling “off” is well, “off”.

So this week I’m taking a moment to pause.

Because when we pause we notice. We notice where we were, where we’ve been and that gives us more confidence as we tread forward into the future. Because it’s when we take that moment to pause and notice that we navigate more skilfully. When we try and power through we’re like a fly crashing into a window, we’re just never going to get out into the fresh air.

And with spring on the horizon, I definitely want more air, more breath, more “wow, that’s was incredible!” moments.

Yes, spring time!

I’ve been hanging out with my meditation cushion a lot of late. Here’s what I’ve been practicing in honour of my friend who’s no longer with us. She taught me so many things, this meditation is a sliver and with spring well on the horizon it’s a good ‘un.

Sit down and make yourself comfortable. Set your timer: 5, 10, 60 minutes – whatever time you have.
Close your eyes and find your breath.

Imagine yourself in an empty field full of the brightest of bright green grass with the sun shining.
Start to think of all the things you have in your life which you’re grateful for. I like to go through different categories of things each day, like: everything within myself, everything within my world, every part of my past, present and future, all of my relationships, all of the things which make me laugh... you’ll find more.
Every time you think of something you get to plant a daisy. Some days daisies will grow quickly, sometimes not so much. What’s important is to look.

When you’ve come up with all the daisies you can, step back and look at your field. Enjoy your breath and being bathed in beauty.

We often forget all of the things we have which make us blessed. Take a few moments today to remember. I promise it will make you feel better.

It is Valentine's day this week...

I’ve read a lot of letters this week. This is my letter, my love letter to yoga.

Dear yoga

I love you, unconditionally and forever. I love that you have landed me so gently in a place in my life which feels perfect. You’ve gave me my life back.

I love that you beckon me silently and persistently to practice every day to open my heart and be vulnerable.

I love the crazy poses, I love that one Addho Mukka Svanasana can shift me. All I have to do is show up, line up and open up.

I love that you’ve brought me some of the most amazing and loving people into my life. People for whom words cannot express my delight at knowing them, it’s simply the echo of a heart calling to a heart.

I love that you make me fearless and emboldened simply by learning to know myself better. I know truly there is nothing to be fearful of.

I love that you weave a rich tapestry of consciousness through each moment. Making each moment is a beautiful expression of beauty in my unique experience.

I love that I can choose to see all of this or choose not to.

May I always stay true.